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John Carter: A Disney Prince of Mars

It looks like John Carter didn’t make enough of a splash at the box office to justify a sequel. To tell the truth, I am more than a little disappointed, because I actually enjoyed the cheesy throw-back charm of a science-fantasy epic that didn’t feel the need for irony or wry self-awareness. However, it’s interesting to look at the movie as part of the Disney canon, and measured against the big Disney films released over the last couple of years (and planned through the end of this one). John Carter seems to fit alongside Tron: Legacy as part of a concentrated effort by the studio in recent years to shift away from their traditional “princess”-orientated features and to produce movies aimed at boys.

Boys are from Mars...

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Non-Review Review: The Chronicles of Riddick

There’s a good movie to be found somewhere inside The Chronicles of Riddick,I’m just not quite sure where. At the very least, you have to admire David Twohy’s ambition, staging a lofty large-scale science-fantasy with old-fashioned production design that we haven’t seen in years. Unfortunately, it’s a very tough type of subgenre to get right, and Twohy doesn’t necessarily come close. I can’t help but feel that Riddick himself is at the core of the problems with the would-be science-fiction epic, which gives any idea of just how deeply rooted those flaws must be.

Vin and gone...

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Non-Review Review: Contraband

Contraband is a thoroughly enjoyable little thriller, albeit one with several significant flaws. Indeed, “thorough” seems to be quite the word to apply to this smuggling caper, as director Baltasar Kormákur and writer Aaron Guzikowski seem intent to wring every possible thrill from the basic plot. While it can lead to some seemingly disjointed tangents, it ensures that there is always something happening, even if it feels like the movie never really develops its core ideas. Still, it’s a solid thriller with a wonderful cast and an interesting enough central premise.

It'll counterfeit right in...

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Garth Ennis’ Run on Punisher MAX – Hardcover, Vol. II (Review)

To celebrate St. Patrick’s Day, this month we’re going to take a look at Northern Irish writer Garth Ennis’ run on that iconic Marvel anti-hero, The Punisher. Check back every Friday and Wednesday for a review of a particular section.

There’s a dream I have from time to time. And in the dream I don’t stop. I kill the soldiers and the hitmen, the extortioners and racketeers, the dark old &%^@s who send them out to fight– I hold the trigger down until they’re all gone–

But I don’t stop.

The innocents are just watching, like always. The slack jawed thousands, gazing at the beast. My family lie red and shredded in the grass. I face the crowd and bring the weapon to my shoulder. If my world ends, I tell them, so does yours.

The recoil starts and I wake up.

It’s  just a dream, I always tell myself. It’s just a dream.

It’s just a dream.

– Frank Castle, Up is Down and Black is White

You know, I’m not entirely sold on the format of Garth Ennis’ Punisher MAX. It seems a strange thing to say, given how I’m slowly starting to appreciate what the writer is doing with the character, but I’m not convinced that the rigid six-issue structure that Ennis is adopting fits the character particularly well. Don’t worry, I know it’s a very strange and irrational complaint to have – partially because there’s so much else going on that merits discussion, and also because six-issue arcs have become the industry norm (because they fit the size of a trade paperback). That said, I think may have figured out why it bothers me so.

Gun play...

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Non-Review Review: The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists (Band of Misfits)

This review was embargoed until 14th March.

There’s a lot of charm to The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists (or Band of Misfits, if you’re so inclined). Aardman Animation might be best known for their distinctive (and beautiful) claymation style, but the studio also has some very sharp writers providing great concepts, ideas and scripts for their madcap films. Pirates! is no different, taking a fairly conventional setting with a fairly conventional central moral, and just throwing absolutely everything against the wall. The result is a genuinely endearing and more-than-a-little madcap family adventure.

A cut above the rest?

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New Battleship Trailer

The guys over at Universal just sent on this latest trailer for their summer blockbuster Battleship. Being entirely honest, I’m not quite sold on the nautical adventure yet, if only because it looks a little bit too much like Transformers… but with boats. Still, I’m willing to be convinced, and I think the movie could work, if it manages to avoid the heavy-handed dour seriousness that sucked the fun out of Michael Bay’s film series. There is, after all, plenty of room for fun in blockbuster cinema and I hope this could offer the fun of something like Real Steel. Personally, I think it’d be worth it simply to hear Liam Neeson utter the line “they sunk my battleship” with the utmost gravitas. (I don’t actually know if he does, but that’s really been something I’ve been hoping for since he was cast. I’m actually 100% serious, I’m imagining the dramatic pauses and everything.)

Anyway, here the trailer is. Make up your own mind on it and let me know.

“Must Do Better”: Dramatic Talents & Wasted Potential…

There’s something very sad about Eddie Murphy. His latest movie, A Thousand Words, opened last Friday in the States with an almost impressive 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. That means that there wasn’t a single reviewer who though that the movie was even “okay”, let alone “good” or “great.” It’s are to find a film that can generate such a consensus, although I don’t think anybody was especially astounded that Eddie Murphy headlined a comedy that was frustrating and disappointing. Of course, he has undoubtedly made a lot of money, and has decided that this is what he wants to do, but there’s something very frustrating about actors like Eddie Murphy, who have demonstrated uncanny ability, but seem willing to settle for generic film after generic film.

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Non-Review Review: Raging Bull

I might disagree with the critical consensus that Raging Bull stands as Martin Scorsese’s crowning accomplishment, or even that it’s probably the best film of the eighties, but there’s no denying that it’s a shockingly powerful piece of cinema. The fact that Scorsese was originally reluctant to direct what had become a passion project for Robert DeNiro just makes the movie’s status as a masterpiece of modern cinema all the more ironic, as the film seems to play like a pitch perfect symphony, each of its many separate elements feeding perfectly into one another to create a whole that is far greater than its incredibly brilliant constituent elements.

The portrait of the boxer as a young man...

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Wallander: Firewall (Review)

The wonderful folks at the BBC have given me access to their BBC Global iPlayer for a month to give the service a go and trawl through the archives. I’ll have some thoughts on the service at the end of the month, but I thought I’d also take the opportunity to enjoy some of the fantastic content.

Firewall feels a bit more like a conventional little mystery thriller, especially measured against Sidetracked, the pilot episode of Wallander. It’s very much a conventional television “whodunnit” (or, perhaps, a “whydunnit”), with our lead character opening an investigation into a fairly simple case, but asking a series of questions that point towards something all-together larger. It does feel a bit lighter than its direct predecessor, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. After all, it retains the two key virtues of the series. Kenneth Branagh is still on fine form as the eponymous detective, while the Swedish scenery is still absolutely haunting.

Hitting a brick Wallander...

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Non-Review Review: We Bought a Zoo

The biggest problem facing We Bought a Zoo is that it can’t ever decide how serious a family drama it wants to be. It follows a family recovering from the loss of their mother by purchasing a zoo and attempting to renovate it, and it never finds a healthy balance between the shamelessly upbeat montage-set-to-classic-pop “live your crazy dreams!” feel-good fun and the heavier subject of a family finding piece. The result is a movie that often feels a little toosweet and a little too earnest at the same time, and never manages to mix the two tones with a great deal of success.

Not quite out of the park...

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