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Non-Review Review: RED 2

Posted on July 25, 2013 by Darren

Red 2 is a stronger film than Red, although it’s still not quite a wholly satisfying cinematic experience. There’s a certain charm to watching all these veteran stars reuniting on the screen together, with a considerably lighter touch than The Expendables. What’s interesting about Red 2 isn’t a dearth of good ideas or interesting hooks in the set-up of this sequel, it’s just a littler rushed, a little unfocused, a little disjointed. However, Red 2 generally moves so fast that these problems never quite reach critical mass. The result is more-than-occasionally great fun, but also just a little too light for its own good.

Growing old disgracefully…

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: anthony hopkins, brian cox, bruce willis, Catherine Zeta-Jones, expendables, film, hannibal lecter, helen mirren, john malkovich, Karl Urban, London, Mary Louise Parker, Moscow, Moses, Movie, non-review review, RED, review | 2 Comments »

Non-Review Review: RED

Posted on February 22, 2011 by Darren

The way that society treats its elderly makes for great fodder for films. After all, what happens to us when we climb over that hill – when we make it all the way to retirement and cease to contribute in the most conventional manner? Will anybody care? Will anybody notice? It’s something that will (hopefully) happen to a lot of us, but it’s not necessarily something we give a lot of thought to – perhaps because we wouldn’t be too comfortable with the answers we’d find. “I never thought this would happen to me,” Joe Matheson confesses at one point as he strolls around “Green Spring Rest Home” with his old colleague, Frank. When Frank asks what he means, Joe elaborates, “Getting old.”

Up to their old tricks...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: brian cox, bruce willis, Ernest Borgnine, films, GoldenEye, helen mirren, john malkovich, Julian McMahon, Mary Louise Parker, Morgan Freeman, Movies, non-review review, RED, retired extremely dangerous, review, Richard Dreyfuss, spies, warren ellis | 2 Comments »

Why Does Transformers Need John Malkovich and Frances McDormand?

Posted on March 23, 2010 by Darren

Francis McDormand and John Malkovich have been cast in Transformers 3. Both are fantastic actors. In fairness, Malkovich has fairly low standards when it comes to choosing his movies – he was linked to Spider-Man 4 as the Vulture before it all fell apart and managed to be the best thing about Con Air (okay, second best – but Steve Buscemi is just awesome anyway) – but McDormand is an actress known for being relatively choosy about her roles. She isn’t exactly matinee idol fare. But, as I read the story, I couldn’t help wondering: why does Michael Bay even need actors for Transformers?

Who needs actors when you have explosions?

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Filed under: Movies | Tagged: actors, films, frances mcdormand, john malkovich, michael bay, Movies, shai labeouf, stars, transformers, transformers 2, transformers 3 | 6 Comments »

The Vulture(s) Circle Spider-Man 4…

Posted on December 11, 2009 by Darren

It’s been a while since I looked at the possible villains lined up for Spider-Man 4. With the shooting date drawing dangerously close, I’ve bowed out of all the rumours we’ve been hearing about the film – mainly about whether The Lizard would be appearing or who would be playing the Black Cat. But, as far as rumours go, this one is too juicy – and too close to the deadline – to avoid discussing. Basically two Oscar-nominated actors – John Malkovich and Anne Hathaway – are playing a pair of villains. Malkovich will be playing Adrian Toomes, and Anne Hathaway will be playing Felicia Hardy – but the character apparently won’t be sharing her comic book counterpart’s secret identity (the Black Cat), instead getting an entirely new secret identity (something called ‘the Vulturess’).

Somebody finally figured out that the only way to make John Malkovich more badass was to strap wings on him...

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Filed under: Movies | Tagged: anne hathaway, black cat, comic book films, films, john malkovich, lizard, marvel, Movies, raptor, sam raimi, sequel, spider man, spider-man 4, spiderman, spiderman 4, the lizard, the raptor, the vulture, the vulturess, villains, vulture, vulturess | Leave a comment »

Non-Review Review: Burn After Reading

Posted on September 18, 2009 by Darren

I caught Burn After Reading last night and sat down with my aunt and uncle to watch it. Sure enough, it was as divisive among us as it was among everyone else – my aunt hated it, my uncle enjoyed it and I loved it. My aunt claimed nothing happened and the cast was full of over-actors, my uncle was relatively satisfied with his viewing experience and I was delighted to see the funnest Coen Brothers film since The Big Lebowski.