Non-Review Reviews | the m0vie blog

Non-Review Review: Fanboys

Posted on July 14, 2011 by Darren

Fanboys is a film that is borderline mediocre, but the tragedy is that it actually could have been really good. It’s quite strange, because the movie seems intent to straddle two audiences – aiming at once for both cult geek cred and mainstream appeal. Of course, the paradox of such an approach is that it frequently ends up alienating both core groups. The film is arguably too deeply entrenched in geek culture to ever find a large mainstream audience, but it’s also far too bland, safe and stereotypical for a geek audience. So it clearly hopes to please everyone, but winds up satisfying no one. Which is a shame, because it seems like it’s actually having a great deal of fun.

Indulge your Dark Side...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: Avery Brooks, chris pine, Darth Maul, Epix, fanboys, fans, film, Geek, geekdom, geeks, Harry Knowles, Harvey Weinstein, james t. kirk, Movies, non-review review, Ray Park, review, Scott Bakula, star trek, William Shatner | Leave a comment »

Non-Review Review: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part II

Posted on July 12, 2011 by Darren

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part II is probably the strongest entry in the film series, and offers a fitting code to the saga of the famous boy wizard. Sleaker, leaner and meaner than most of its predecessors, I can actually understand – artistically – why Warners opted to split the final book into two distinct chapters. In many ways, the previous instalment (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part I) felt like another year with the Hogwarts crowd, while the finale here represents an epilogue to the entire series. Threads hinted at and developed since the first film are all tied up here, and – isolated from a lot of the soap opera of early episodes – the last in the series provides some stunning closure.

The wiz kid returns...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: adaptation, alan rickman, daniel radcliffe, deathly hallows, Emma Watson, film, harry potter, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, harry potter and the deathly hallows: part 2, harry potter and the deathly hallows: part ii, Hogwarts, Maggie Smith, Movies, non-review review, ralph fiennes, review, Rupert Grint, sequel, the deathly hallows, Voldemort, wizards | 8 Comments »

Non-Review Review: Mars Attacks!

Posted on July 8, 2011 by Darren

I have a genuine affection for Mars Attacks! It’s certainly not Tim Burton’s best work, but it’s also miles above some of his more disappointing output. It feels like an affectionate homage to Ed Wood, putting together the kind of movie that the old B-movie director would have approved of, except with the judgement to play it as a comedy rather than entirely straight (although Wood’s filmography is typically “so bad it’s good“, one could scarcely accuse the director of being in on the joke), and made with a more significant budget. Seen in that light, it’s hard to resist the movie’s (admittedly uneven) charms.

The chances of anything coming from Mars are a million to one, they say...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: arts, cheesy, danny elfman, Ed Wood, film, films, hokey, hokey sci-fi, jack nicholson, Mars Attacks!, Martian, martians, Movie, Movies, non-review review, paul winfield, pulp, pulp fiction, pulp sci-fi, review, sci-fi, tim burton, Topps | 4 Comments »

Non-Review Review: Larry Crowne

Posted on July 7, 2011 by Darren

Larry Crowne isn’t a terrible movie, but rather a frustrating one. Written by, directed by, and starring, Tom Hanks, the movie seems to want to be a romantic comedy skewered towards older and more mature viewers, which is a great idea – not only because so few movies cater to that demographic, but because the few comedies that do have been proven successes. The audience is there, and it’s a great idea to unite Julia Roberts and Tom Hanks, the king and queen of the classy nineties rom-com in a film that might have a more considered and reflective edge over most other romantic comedies. Unfortunately, the movie is so ridiculously pedestrian that it’s hard to work up any excitement. If the movie, rather than the character, were doing the college courses in the film, it would get graded “must do better.”

A scoot couple...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: Bryan Cranston, film, films, George Takei, julia roberts, Larry Crowne, Movies, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Nia Vardalos, non-review review, Pam Grier, review, romantic comedy, tom hanks | 2 Comments »

Non-Review Review: Monsters vs. Aliens

Posted on July 7, 2011 by Darren

I do quite like Monsters vs. Aliens, even if it feels like it’s trying to do too many vastly different things are once. It’s too goofy and silly to be a genuinely emotional morality tale about appreciating those different than us, while also being too sentimental to work as a sort of a goofy hokey monster mash nostalgia trip. One gets the sense that it could have been a much better film had it opted for one approach rather than the other, instead of trying to straddle the middle ground between them. It’s a shame, because it has some genuinely impressive sequences and warm sense of respect and good humour for all those classic creature features, but it just ends up feeling too much like a standard cookie-cutter modern animated film.

It's a Monster Mash!

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: Amazing Colossal Man, animation, arts, dr. strangelove, dreamworks, films, hugh laurie, Monsters Vs Aliens, Movies, non-review review, paul rudd, Reese Witherspoon, review, Seth Rogen | Leave a comment »

Non-Review Review: The Guard

Posted on July 6, 2011 by Darren

“Good to go,” an Irish drug smuggler remarks as the plan comes together for a big delivery. His English colleague derisively remarks, “I f**king hate that. Americanisms. ‘Good to go’!” It’s hard not to read small moments like this as a bit of self-reference on the part of John Michael McDonagh, as the film takes every opportunity to reflect on the Irish fascination and digestion of American pop culture, as contrasted against the somewhat unique national character. Sparkling with witty dialogue and packed with sharply-observed commentaries on Ireland and its relationship with our bigger Atlantic cousin, The Guard is a clever little film that is well worth your time.

Once upon a time in the West...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: brendan gleeson, buddy cop film, buddy film, comedy, don cheadle, Eddie Rockets, Federal Bureau of Investigation, films, Fionnula Flanagan, Ireland, irish cinema, john mcdonagh, liam cunningham, mark strong, Movies, non-review review, review, the guard, United States | 17 Comments »

Non-Review Review: The Sorcerer’s Apprentice

Posted on July 4, 2011 by Darren

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice is a movie that really works very much better than it really should. It’s clunky, predictable and standard box office fare, hardly designed to provoke or probe the extremes of the human imagination. It opens with a clunky exposition-filled narration which crams an entire franchise’s worth of back story into what should be a simple and straight forward tale, which even Ian McShane’s distinctive tones can’t completely elevate. From there on out, its by-the-numbers and fairly straight-forward. On the other hand, the movie has something that the vast majority of other summer blockbusters are seriously lacking in.

And that thing, my friends, is Nicolas Cage.

Cage certainly takes some balsy roles...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: blockbuster, Fantasia, films, ian mcshane, Jay Baruchel, Mickey Mouse, Movies, nicolas cage, non-review review, review, Sorcerer's Apprentice, the sorcere's apprentice, tropic thunder, Wicker Man | 6 Comments »

Non-Review Review: Drive Angry

Posted on July 1, 2011 by Darren

I really liked Drive Angry, which feels like cinematic junk food. It’s not especially well-made, it’s not good for you, but damn if it isn’t just a little bit tasty. It’s not art, it won’t make you think, and it isn’t going to appear on too many “best of”lists. However, it’s the dirtiest, trashiest, most ridiculously over-the-top adventure that I’ve seen in quite some time. It might have felt like the engine was going to pull right out of the body, but it was a heck of a ride.

When you Cage the Beast, the Beast gets angry...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: Accountant, Bible Belt, Drive Angry, film, films, John Milton, Last Exorcism, Movies, nicolas cage, non-review review, review, Satan, United States, william fichtner | 2 Comments »

Non-Review Review: The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

Posted on June 30, 2011 by Darren

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is a wasted opportunity. The superb graphic novels by Alan Moore are among the best that comics have to offer, and even the basic concept of picking a variety of public domain character to base an action adventure around has a sort of pulpy thrill to it. It could have been a very witty and a very clever film, or it could have just been an effective big-budget blockbuster. In the end, unfortunately, the film is neither – it ends up feeling more like a waste of effort for all involved.

I feel like shredding this film...

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Filed under: Non-Review Reviews | Tagged: alan moore, art, British Empire, Captain Nemo, films, league of extraordinary gentlemen, meta-fiction, Mina Harker, Mister Hyde, Movies, non-review review, review, Tony Curran | 2 Comments »

Non-Review Review: Transformers 3 – Dark of the Moon

Posted on June 28, 2011 by Darren

Here’s the thing: I don’t really expect a lot from Transformers: Dark of the Moon. It’s a movie about two rival factions of robots who engage in civil war on Earth. It’s not the stuff of epic tragedy or cinematic masterpieces. It’s designed to offer knock-down brawls, superb CGI, stunning action and a handful of fist-pumping moments. I’m cool with that. I don’t expect any more than that, and – to a certain extent – the movie meets my basic needs. However, despite a superb supporting cast and some superb special effects, the movie feels a little too self-important and po-faced to ever really engage. The final forty minutes are something to behold, but there’s just too much mundane plotting and pompous pseudo-philosophical rambling in the first two hours to really justify it.