Tarzan is a mess. The core tale of a boy raised by apes who struggles to reconnect with his human heritage will always have resonance – the character has endured much more successfully than Edgar Rice Borroughs’ other pulp hero, John Carter. However, this motion-capture adaptation feels like it spends more time pandering and condescending than it does trying to tell an interesting or engaging story.
All the “big” Tarzan moments are hit with the enthusiasm of checking off a list (from “me, Tarzan — you, Jane” to “ooo-ee-ooo-ee-ooo-ee-ooo!”), but there is a staggering lack of trust in the idea of Tarzan to carry a Tarzan movie. Tarzan is a family film that very heavily talks down to its audience – a family constructed around the idea that children aren’t smart enough to follow basic narrative structures. So not only is the plot incredibly one-dimensional, predictable and linear, it is repeatedly and patronisingly explained to the audience.

I am Tarzan, hear me roar!
The last decade has seen an explosion in family-friendly movies that don’t talk down to the younger members of the audience. They recognise that children are not idiots and are capable of following basic plot structures and recognising archetypes. Generally speaking, the success of classic Pixar speaks to the idea that children are shrewder than most animators would have conceded. The strong family films of the last few years have followed suit, realising that kids don’t just want bright colours and snazzy animation – they want the same thing any viewer wants, a good story well told.
Tarzan feels like something on an unnecessary hold-over. The movie looks fairly good – even if the motion capture isn’t cutting edge, the 3D is rendered very well; even if the environments outside the jungle look like levels from a videogame, the jungle itself feels vibrant. However, the script isn’t even willing to stand aside and let the visuals carry the story. The result is a patronising and condescending mess that feels like it is talking down to an audience that it grossly under-estimates.

Bird song…
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